Dilemma
by Tasha9315
Summary: Peter Pettrigrew faces a dilemma about betraying the Potters especially due to his feelings for James


**I do NOT own any part of Harry Potter. This is merely fanfiction**

**This story was written for the House Competition by Moonlight Forgotten (Year 4)**

**Round 5**

**House: Gryffindor**

**Position: Year 1**

**Category: Standard**

**Prompt: Peter Pettigrew**

**Words: 779**

Peter stood in front of the Potter's Godric's Hollow cottage and rang the bell. He was greeted by James with a baby Harry in his arms.

"Peter!" James excitedly gave him a one armed hug before gesturing him inside. "Harry, say hi to Uncle Peter" said James but Harry whined and stubbornly buried his face into his father's shoulder. "Harry, it's just Uncle Peter," James tried to pacify his son but the toddler refused to look up.

"I'm sorry Peter. I think he's just cranky and you know babies. They sometimes take time to warm up to some people," James said apologetically.

"It's fine," said Peter dismissively. "Where's Lily?"

"Lily's down with a bad headache so I told her to sleep in while I handled breakfast and Harry".

Peter looked around the house as they walked into the kitchen. It was significantly smaller than the Potter's actual home, but they had to keep moving from home to home as Voldermort found out about their location. Dumbledore had finally suggested they use the Fidelus Charm so that they didn't have move anymore. Sirius was their Secret Keeper. The Potters were of course blissfully unaware that it was Peter who kept revealing their locations to Voldermort. However, he was unable to do so now as they were protected by the Fidelus Charm.

James sat Harry on a baby's chair and tied a bip on him.

"Dada" Harry whined, looking wearily at Peter when James began walking away.

"Daddy will be right back. I'm just getting oats for you and your Uncle Peter", said James as he walked to the counter and returned with a pot of oats.

He poured some on Peter's plate and some on a small baby bowl for Harry.

Peter watched James feeding Harry by making aeroplane movements with his spoon. Looking at Harry always gave him pain. It reminded him that James loved another woman and built a life with her. He had been in love with James since they were teens, but James had never returned those feelings and only ever loved him as a friend. During their initial years, he felt bad that James thought he was thick and it motivated him to work harder to impress him. He would be ever so delighted whenever James was impressed with any skills he showed or whenever James praised him. The former arrogant toerag getting nicer as he got older only made it harder to get over him. Peter never told James how he felt but he knew it was no point as James never looked at him the way he looked at Lily.

"Peter, what's wrong?" James snapped him out of his thought.

"What … oh … nothing … I was just worried about the war".

"Me too. I feel so helpless reading about deaths of innocent people. Peter, you don't believe Remus is the spy like Sirius do you? Remus is one of the kindness people there is. He would never do such a thing. Even Lily thinks Sirius might have a point. But you trust him don't you?" he asked hopefully.

"Yeah, of course. It's definitely not Remus", said Peter awkwardly.

Unbeknownst to James, he knew because he himself was the spy.

Peter paced uncertainly up and down his room. He partly wished he wasn't put in this predicament. He had been made the Potter's Secret Keeper. They had decided on Sirius's advice to switch to him. Peter had reluctantly accepted partly because he wanted to serve his master, Voldermort. He became a Death Eater after much thought more than a year ago when he saw that Voldermort's side was winning. He didn't want to risk his safety by fighting for the losing side. He always got behind the most powerful people for his protection. He became a Death Eater when he could no longer be confident enough that James and Sirius could protect him from the Dark side.

Now he had to directly deliver the Potters to their deaths. He didn't have much hesitating about Lily and Harry dying, but his guilt was for James. He was in love with him and didn't want him dead. Peter even considered asking Voldermort to spare just James but he was afraid that Voldermort would see this as betrayal and kill him. Even if Voldermort did honor his request, James would be alive to testify that he was the Secret Keeper. Peter couldn't have that. Between being thrown in prison and James dying, he would rather have James dead to protect his own skin. He loved the Marauder, but he loved himself more. Peter finally made up his mind. He would deliver the Potters to Voldermort.


End file.
